Saturday, September 6, 2008

SUPER BLOG

So for those of you who have lost hope in my blog but are reading this right now...Thank you for being patient. I can't tell you how many times I have sat down to describe what the Lord has done in my life in the past 3-4 weeks and drawn out due to the overwhelming amount of thoughts floating around in my head. After reading my last blog, I realized that I really left a lot of you in the dark and I sincerely apologize for that.

After camp, life was confusing--every choice I had to make brought about its own problems, conclusions, consequences, and even fulfillment. I never felt more helpless than I did in this time, and for that I will forever be thankful! As soon as I made the decision in my mind to move to Chattanooga, things started to change. I decided the weekend after camp was over to stay in Bowling Green and spend some time with my dear friend Christy. That Sunday I went to a cookout at a friends house expecting to only partake in some good burgers and fun with friends, but what I got was an answer that I had been waiting for. Her dad is a dentist ( a GREAT dentist!) and that detail honestly slipped my mind until he began discussing my career in dental hygiene with me. The conversation ended in a simple request that I help him out in his office for a couple of weeks, which wasn't promising long term but definitely meant that I had to hang around bowling green a little while longer. After this I had a two hour drive home where I spent almost every minute praying about my conversation with Dr.Clemmons--that the Lord would use me in his office and that he would give Dr.Clemmons discernment in the amount of work I did for him. Eventually, all in the same week, Dr.Clemmons offered me a full-time position in his Brownsville office, I found a place to live, I joined a small group, and I was given the opportunity to lead a small group of college women which is exactly what I feel lead to do. Providence. That word pretty much sums up my life right now. For those of you who have doubted God's ability to provide what you need and more--I am living proof! He really does want the best for us!

When I reflect on this summer and what the Lord taught me through my experience, humility is the only word that comes to mind. This summer I truly learned the meaning of sacrifice--to see myself as nothing in order to serve others. I failed at this A LOT, but for me this summer was about learning and about humbling myself, usually to the point of tears in repentance for every selfish ambition in my heart. My heart was exposed in so many ways this summer, and without that experience I'm not sure if I could handle the world that I am in now. A hymn continues to hum in my mind as I write about this:

"Jesus paid it all, all to him I owe, sin had left a crimson stain he washed it white as snow"

See, -Jesus paid it all- I learned the meaning of this through my experience at camp. I realized the sacrifice that I was called to model through Jesus' endurance of the cross. Jesus resisted sin and pride to the point of shedding his blood, and he constantly reminded me of that this summer when I sinfully wanted attention or recognition for the things I had done. -All to him I owe- Now that I have experienced the depths of his love through his grace, even when my sin was exposed in the deepest parts of my soul, I know even more that everything I have I owe to him. I must fear him even more now than when all I had was faith in his plan for me.

So now I sit....I cry...I marvel...I rest...I have peace and most of all amazement. Thank you for your prayers and for your love and support through a very confusing yet rewarding time in my life. Please pray that I continue to be a faithful steward with the life that I have been given-with my money, my time, my relationships, etc... more to come...I promise :)

2 comments:

From the Heart said...

Kasey, I'm so thankful to have spent the summer with you! You were a wonderful example of selflessness and perseverence, especially when I thought I couldn't make it through the WHOLE summer. Thanks for sharing your testimony -- I'm super thankful you are in Bowling Green for now!! Love you.

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