A Journey Called Life

Beautiful

2010-01-27T21:17:00.001-08:00

Just wanted to share this picture of a beautiful little girl with her loving Daddy. She truly is an angel. More to come..........

BE STILL!!

2010-01-16T06:58:00.000-08:00

If you know me at all, you know that the words "be still" are not familiar to me. I am moving from the time I wake up to the time I lay down at night-unless of course I had a long day at work, then I just confine myself to the bat tub so that I have no choice but to sit there in one place. I am also an avid planner. Not a day goes by that my every move is not planned to a tee. This drives some (J.R) crazy because not all (J.R) beat to the same drum ;). While this busyness aids me in getting a LOT of things done a one time, it also hinders me from listening to God and from experiencing his peace. I realized this morning, as I sat in bed with my computer in my lap, that I was feeding my anxieties in order to avoid the quiet. In the quiet I realize what is going on around me, and it is always much easier to just stay busy than to sit and put things into perspective.

This morning I reached this conclusion after reading a daily devotional from one of my all time favorites, Elisabeth Elliot (www.elisabethelliot.org). She spoke of the peace that comes from God, the peace that passes all understanding, the peace that is not of this world. She defined the peace of God as being "The absence of conflict with the will of God. It means harmony within, concord with his purpose for our lives". It finally dawned on me that I had made it impossible for myself to be still. I misunderstood my responsibilities to be anxieties, which in turn gave me obligation to sit and worry-CONSTANTLY! Yes, I have responsibilities, but all should be done in the harmony of God's will. I am getting married because it is God's will for me to be a wife, not because I am supposed to have a wedding and put on a show for my family and friends. My niece is sick and it is very sad, but it is God's will that we give him glory for all he has done for her thus far and what he will do through her life in the future. It is God's will that I go to work and share his love with those around me, but If I don't have this perspective before I walk in the door my entire day is full of worries and wonders of how I can get ahead in my career. Right now all I can think about is that there are towels in my dryer (go figure), but if I go on with my chores without even a glimpse of peace in my heart, they become anxieties instead of responsibilities-my will instead of God's will.

I realize a lot of this may be ramblings, but it sure did help me put things into perspective. I am going to go about my day now, but with this scripture in my heart and on my mind:

" Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts nad your minds in Christ Jesus. " Philippians 4:7.

Christmas at St.Jude

2009-12-26T10:48:00.000-08:00

This year I spent Christmas at St.Jude. Bummer, you might say, but really it was one of the most blessed Christmas's I have ever had. Usually my Christmas mornings revolve around waking up, opening presents, then lounging around the house all day eating leftovers and watching movies. Yesterday, presents were the last thing on my mind. We woke up very early to take my nephew Phillip to the hospital so Santa could come visit him along with his sister. St.Jude let my Sister and her husband pick out Christmas gifts for their sick little girl and even for little phillip. When I say gifts I mean more than you could ever imagine giving a child on christmas morning. They gave away things such as DVD players, Nintendo DS, bikes, movies, games, etc...and all for FREE!!! Kaelyn got a handheld dvd player, some movies, games and lots more! St.Jude continues to amaze me with their service and thoughtfulness. All that I wanted to do on Christmas morning was be with my family, comfort my sister, and see joy in Kaelyns eyes, and I experienced all three of these wonderful things. For the first time in two days, I saw Kaelyn raise up out of bed with excitement in her eyes and to me, that was Christmas. God gave our family many blessings and this Christmas I learned not to take them for granted.

I also have to take the time to mention how thankful I am to be spending the rest of my life with JR, who is selfless and wonderful!! He came to St.Jude on his birthday to be with me and he will never truly know how much that meant to me and my family. Not only did he comfort me, he helped tremendously with little Phillip! He carted him around because he is possibly the most stout two year old I have ever known, and he even stayed with him on christmas morning while Kaelyn opened her presents so my mom and I could be with her. I guess I should mention too that Phillip threw up all over the place while JR was watching him-just a minor glitch in the plans, but I think he would consider it a growing experience. JR is a trooper and I love him more everday!!! Thank you JR for all that you have done for us, and I think you are officially initiated into the family ;)

For those of you who read my blog and would like an update: Kaelyn is responding really well to the treatment. She is experiencing a massive amount of side effects and is very sick most of the time, but the mass in her chest is shrinking and the chemo is doing its job. She is having a hard time understanding her sickness and really doesn't want to hear about it so pray for her that she will have a better understanding as Cal and Krystal try to explain things to her the best they can. She will be having a rough day today with chemo treatment, spinal tap, and a blood transfusion, so especially lift prayers up for her today that her body would continue to fight. Thanks EVeryone!

God is good, ALL the time

2009-12-22T15:51:00.000-08:00

As most of you know my neice, Kaelyn Adams, was diagnosed today with T-cell Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL). She is a beautiful, precious child of God who has more faith than my entire family combined. She has been sick on and off for the past two months and has been in and out of the doctor with diagnosis after diagnosis. It wasn't until they identified a large mass in her chest that they suspected cancer, but as soon as they found this they sent her immediately to St.Jude's Children's Hospital in Memphis, TN. That is where I am now, sitting in a hotel room waiting for my 2 year old nephew to wake up from a nap. I have become his keeper in the last two days, but I'm loving every minute of it!

This is a nightmare for our family, but through it all I am reminded of one thing. Although this fallen world brings us suffering that is sometimes unbearable, we rest in savior who brings healing and hope of eternity to our hearts. The more I hear about unfaithful marriages, murders, and sweet children with cancer, the more I thirst for eternity with my savior.

Long story short, please pray for my family, for kaelyn's doctors, and for Kaelyn. But also remember to have heaven always on your mind.

Grace Revealed

2009-08-23T20:15:00.000-07:00

Grace seems so simple. Grace-receiving something we don't deserve. We sin, we repent, we are loved. Not a hard concept to grasp. Unless your name is Kasey and you are a little slow at recognizing a good thing when you see it. Reflecting on how God has richly provided for me in the past year only brings me to confusion because I constantly ask myself why? Why does he continue to place wonderful people in my life? Why does he continue to provide for me? Why does he choose to use me for his kingdom work? The fact that I even ask these questions should give me a clue that I've missed the mark, but somehow asking them helped me see the sweet truth behind it all. Today as I walked through mammoth cave thinking out loud with my sweet and patient boyfriend by my side, I realized very quickly that all of my questions led me straight back to the cross. I am almost confident that he could see the light bulb pop over my head when I realized that all I need is JESUS! The more I am provided with, the more I recognize my need for a savior. I have an awesome job, but I can only face the work day when I know the power of the Holy Spirit is working in me to share the love of Christ with my co-workers. My Church family is unbelievable, but they can never love me the way Jesus does. I have a boyfriend who brings a lot of joy to my life and whom I am so thankful for, but even he can not satisfy the thirst I have for fellowship with Jesus Christ. Ultimately, Gods grace is shown to me in helping me recognize how insignificant all other things are compared to him. I am so thankful for this truth and pray there are more light bulbs to come!

I probably haven't shared anything profound that you've never heard before, but thats not the point of my blog. I just want you to take part in the simple truths revealed to me by God as I experience life in the "real world". So thats it for today...thank you Mammoth cave for giving me time away from the world to think and thank you J.R. for inspiring me to blog again :)

Here are some pictures from our adventure today.

I made him pose...he felt really awkward :)

pretty deer hangin' out in the road.

we found a pretty waterfall and you guessed it...self timer!! Of COURSE this was our first try, HAH!

Coming Soon...

2009-08-21T15:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the temporary Hiatus from the blogging world! This summer sort of put me into a blogger identity crisis, but I will be re-vamped and ready to blog before you know it!! I can't wait to fill you in on all that God is doing in my life!

Until next time....

Precious

2009-05-01T12:06:00.000-07:00

This is my nephew waiting to have surgery. They found blockage in his kidneys before he was born and are attempting (for the 2nd time) to clear it all up today. Pray for him and for my family. He is just so little and sweet and innocent. You can tell in this picture that he doesn't have a clue..lol!

Pressing On

2009-03-21T14:42:00.000-07:00

In the past couple of weeks I've noticed that when I pull my running shoes out of the closet and step into training mode, my body is not the only thing that experiences change. Physical discipline always leads me to a more intimate bond with the Lord.

I signed up to run a 10k with the Mardis family on July 4th, so I figured now would be a great to time to start training. I love to run, but I've always been one to set limits for myself-assuming that my body could not possibly make it when the going gets tough. This time, I have no limits; only goals and expectations. I expect my mind to push my body and my body to endure on EVERY SINGLE run! I have a tendency to become easily discouraged in times when I am pushing myself to reach a goal. I often look around me and wonder why I can't just run 6 miles or why at the end of my first 3 mile run my body wanted to collapse. I am guilty of comparison and of doubt. But this time the the Lord used my circumstances to completely change my outlook on reaching my goals and expectations.

Just the other day I ran 2.5 miles, which doesn't sound like a lot, but I was only in week two of my training so my body was adjusting. This run was a cake walk until the last half mile. It was then that my legs began to feel heavy and my chest began to weaken. I also began to feel that doubt creep in. My mind told me that this pain was a sign of weakness, that I wasn't a runner, and that I should just give up if I can't even run this small distance free of pain. Then the Lord intervened with his word:

" Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." Phil. 3:13-14

These words are ones that I have heard repeatedly throughout my life. Church, camp, bible study, etc..., but in this context their impact somehow spread much deeper than the surface. Running is hard but LIFE is harder, and if I throw my hands in the air every time the world smacks me in the face then I am defeated and ultimately this defeat will stand firmly as a wall between me and my savior. In trusting the Lord with my heart, I have also promised perseverance. When I run I always visualize the pavement at least 10 steps ahead of me, and I have realized that in life I must do the same. It's easy to allow life's present circumstances to hinder my hope for the future, but I have vowed to keep my eyes on the path ahead; not looking back, but STRAINING forward.

Know that writing this is harder than it seems. I started writing this post two weeks ago and am now seeing how I have allowed life to leave me defeated. Today I took a long drive down a one lane country road. I was by myself, windows down, radio off, and I had no idea where I was. One thing I do know-God used this time to speak to me, to bring to light how life was bogging me down. On this drive he showed me freedom and made me vulnerable to who I am in HIM. For a short amount of time I was able to see far enough ahead to live in hope that God has great things planned for me. He doesn't need me but he is CHOOSING to use me every day for the rest of my life. Somehow I lost sight of this. I felt as if my days of impacting others for him were over....the ridiculousness of that is inexpressible.

This season in life is different from any other, and while I have never felt so stable I have also never felt such a strong desire for complacency. I praise my Lord that he has offered me a remedy for this toxic desire-perseverance. Keep pressing on.

He set my feet upon a rock.....now I know!

2009-02-28T20:44:00.000-08:00

So I'm just gonna say it-I love to cry..there... I admit it! Sometimes nothing feels better than an outpouring of emotion that has been waiting to come out for days, weeks, maybe even months! Trust me, this doesn't happen often, but when I do feel that rush of emotion spiraling through my chest it is absolutely vital to my soul that this rush pour out of my face. I believe the most rewarding part of this emotional force is that in the moment I feel absolutely vulnerable to the Love of my savior. All too often I take his Love for granted, but the more I recognize my doubt and fear the more I feel his embrace.

Last weekend I found myself looking for answers, wondering if I could ever be confident in knowing who I am in Christ; Wishing I could speak and act with the boldness of the Holy Spirit; Praying for peace and begging for Joy. It was in these moments when the words of this wonderful psalm began to cycle through my head:

" I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry. 2He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog,and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. 3He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the Lord." Psalm 40:1-3

This absolutely crushed my fear and humiliated my doubt. I waited, and faithfully my Lord answered. Almost immediately after recognizing my impatience he clutched my heart and pulled me to safety in his arms. He set my feet on a rock and put a new song in my mouth; a song of praise to him, who loves unconditionally! He literally put a song in my mouth, and I went to bed singing it on Sunday night:

Jesus , Lover of my soul
Jesus, I will never let you go
You carried me from the miry clay
set my feet upon a rock and now I know
I love you, I need you
Though my world fall I'll never let you go
My savior, my closest friend
I will worship you until the very end

Who Am I?

2009-01-31T10:37:00.000-08:00

Who Am I?

Who am I? they often tell me
I stepped from my cell's confinement
calmly, cheerfully, firmly,
like a squire from his country house.

Who am I? They often tell me
I used to speak to my warders
freely and friendly and clearly,
as though it were mine to command

Who am I? They also tell me
I bore the days of misfortune
equably, smilingly, proudly,
like one accustomed to win.

Am I then really that which other men tell of?
Or am I only what I myself know of myself?
Restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage,
struggling for breath, as though hands were
compressing my throat,
yearning for colours, for flowers, for the voices of birds,
thirsting for words of kindness, neighborliness,
tossing in expectation of great events,
powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance,
weary and empty at praying, at thinking, at making,
faint and ready to say farewell to it all.

Who am I? This or the other?
Am I one person to-day and to-morrow another?
Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others,
and before myself a contemptible woebegone weakling?
Or is something within me still like a beaten army
fleeing in disorder from victory already achieved?

Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of
mine.
Who I am, Thou knowest, O God, I am thine!

-Dietrich Bonhoeffer-

Every time I read this poem it reminds me of the sin I have to deflect everyday in order to be a light for the Lord. Sometimes I wonder the same things about myself that Bonhoeffer wrote of in this poem. Secretly I yearn for praise and even tire of praying. I am distracted by sin while worshiping God. I often do things for my own glorification, and my motives are often impure. I am a sinner and I face a dire need for repentance on a day-to-day basis; not just confession, I actually have to turn from my sin everyday and allow the Lord to replace it. Praise Jesus that amidst our sin we have the grace to be HIS and to live with HIS love and mercy. Praise him that I no longer live in bondage of this sin but that I am free to live a life in obedience to Christ.

New Perspective

2009-01-27T11:55:00.000-08:00

This is just a small reflection on the events that took place last week during the inauguration of our new president. Hopefully a perspective that you will enjoy.

I'm sure we all had different perspectives on the images we saw and words we heard, but as a follower of Jesus Christ I saw a bit of truth that gave me hope for my future and made me thankful for my freedom.

As I watched millions of people around the world come together for their hope in a brighter, more promising future, I could only think of what it would be like if this enthusiasm and praise were directed toward the awesome glory of our Creator. Then I remembered that one day that was going to happen. I was reminded of a particular passage in Romans ( Romans 8:18-25) that talked about our suffering as God's creation and how it does not compare to the glory that will one day be revealed to us. This passage also talks about how creation groans for the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and how one day creation will be set free from bondage and decay. This passage ends in saying:

" For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we wait for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience." Romans 8: 24-25

Knowing this, I chose to look at this wonderful day in history as a reminder of what will one day become of God's creation, and to continue fulfilling my purpose here in patience-always looking forward to the coming of our Lord.

This day also reminded of how thankful I am for my freedom in Jesus Christ. I've lived in a life of bondage. I know what it feels like to be covered in sin rather than in Jesus' redeeming blood. Looking back, I see nothing but hope in the freedom that I now have from my sins. This freedom gives me so much more to look forward to than the freedom I have to live in this country. Every right, every material possesion, every assest I have in this world will one day fade away, but God's promise to me for an eternity spent with my him will never die. There are so many scriptures to qoute here, but the one that echoes in my head is Galatians 5:1

"For freedom Christ has set us free, stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery."

That entire chapter is great and I recommend reading it if it sounds new to you.

So basically what Im trying to say is: If you have hope and freedom in Jesus Christ, you can look at these words with a new perspective. A perspective that brings eternal promises for the future.

Tagged!

2009-01-11T20:09:00.000-08:00

okay, so two people have tagged me in this fun little blog tag so its time I own up to my responsibility. Here are the rules:

Here are the rules:
1) Choose the 4th folder where you store your pictures on your computer.
2) Select the 4th picture in the folder.
3) Explain the picture.
4) Tag 4 people to do the same. No cheating (cropping, editing, etc.)

okay, I don't have a computer so I actually went to facebook and used my pictures there to do this tag. Not cheating, just improvising!

I find this picture humorous because I really have no idea what is going on, lol. This is Ben Carr, Preston Davis, and Rob Herron...I worked with all of them at camp last summer. Ben was the media guy, preston the dock daddy, Rob was a counselor and he led worship. This picture was taken at Mis Amigos in Hixson during boat driver training, and I'm pretty sure Ben was trying to make Preston feel awkward, Preston just smiles because theres a camera in his face, and Rob is just Rob..I have no idea..lol. This is just one of the many awesome memories I have from Camp last summer, I could probably do a blog a day about these photos and enjoy every minute of it!! Camp is and always will be a huge part of my life and I am so thankful for all of you who made the memories of that place so sweet in my heart :) Love you all!!

Now I have to tag other people, sooooo......

1. Kristin Mardis...BEST FRIEND!!
2. Jessica Paulsen
3. Brandie Lindsey
4. Joanna Kyle

Have Fun! sorry if you've already been tagged!

Just Go With It

2009-01-05T17:56:00.000-08:00

As I type, I haven't an inkling of a clue what I am going to name this blog. I also do not have organized thoughts as I usually do when I sit down to share something. All that I have is the wonderful peace of knowing hope in my savior.

Have you ever desired something so badly that you weren't sure you could make it through the week without knowing if God is going to give it to you? If you say no, then I will give you this chance to secretly admit that you're wrong.............................................okay, now that we're all on the same page I will continue. After realizing how selfish it is to demand this of God, have you ever decided that following him without this desire fulfilled is possible and maybe even rewarding? If we claim to follow him then we should and MUST have this outlook on all of life's demands. The cost of discipleship is high and carrying our cross everyday is a command in scripture. Take a minute to meditate on Luke 14:25-33. It's a long passage, so if you want to follow along you may actually have to get your Bible out. Here are some tidbits:

vs. 27 " Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple"
vs.33 " Therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple"

Basically, from this passage we can gather that from the time we received salvation we were made aware of our calling as believers ( matthew 28:19-20). So why is it so hard for us to look past the happiness of the world in order to find joy in Christ? I'm not pretending to be a perfect example of this biblical definition of discipleship, but in recent circumstance I am learning to see through to the core of this concept.

This doesn't mean that life here is supposed to always be suffering, lonliness, sadness, etc... Look at Davids words in psalm 27:

" Teach me your way, O Lord, and lead me on a level path because of my enemies. Give me not up to the will of my adversaries; for false witnesses have risen against me, and they breathe out violence. I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"

Patience, the key to discerning the Lords will! Also the understanding that this "goodness" may not always be what we expect it to be.

With that being said, as believers we all desire to see good in the land of the living and to have peace about living in the Lords will, but a fickle heart will never truly see the beauty and joy of trusting the Lord! Elisabeth Elliot once said:

" A steadfast heart is not prone to fickleness"

and that has been in my head everyday to remind me of the cost required. Now, I think i will name this blog " Just Go With It". Because that worked for me tonight.

Clogged With Wishes

2008-12-06T19:21:00.000-08:00

Saturday night...surprise, surprise :).

So, like most of the time, I think Elisabeth Elliot says what I'm thinking a lot better than I can put it into words. Here it is:

"I was wishing that my wishes were what God wished, and if my wishes were not what God wished, I wished that I could wish that my wishes would go away, but the wishes were still there." Elisabeth Elliot, passion and purity

It's amazing to me that pursuing God's will can be peacful and quiet one day then loud and complicated the next. After hearing these words from Elisabeth Elliot I realized why in the last few days I have felt weak and distant from God. As soon as I say Yes to his calling I simultaneously receive wishes and desires in my heart that cause me to reconsider the direction I'm heading. That doesn't mean that I desire God's will any less, just that circumstance has allowed me to see it differently in my life. The problem? you may ask. The problem is that I begin to wonder how God can work his will in me if I am clogged by these wishes and desires of my own. Now as I write this, it is obvious that the conclusion is that I should rest in God's peace regardless of my circumstance. This is true, but the wishes ARE still there; day and night; hour by hour. I must take all of my wishes and desires captive to be hidden under the authority of Christ, and wait patiently for the Lord to lead me through life in his will. I must rest in a place where true joys are to be found.

Almighty God, You alone can bring into order

the unruly wills and affections of sinners:

Grant you people grace to love what you command

and desire what you promise;

That, among the swift and varied changes of the world,

Our hearts may surely there be fixed where true joys are to be found;

through Jesus Christ our Lord,

who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit,

One God, now and forever. Amen

(The book of common prayers)

Sacred Claim

2008-11-24T16:33:00.000-08:00

First off, I apologize to all who at one time read my blog. I am going to throw out the excuse of being without a computer. My roommate has a computer and so does my work, but I am rarely on it long enough to blog about the things on my heart that I really want to share. However, tonight my roommate is gone and I am once again left pondering alone in my apartment on a Saturday night. Please don't feel sorry for me though, lately I intentionally spend time alone for no other purpose than to hear my creator speak to me. I am beginning to enjoy a newfound appreciation for introversion.

With that being said, life has been full of revelation, joy, and contentment for me in Bowling Green. I have come to know the full meaning of God "bringing all things together for the good of those who love him." (Romans 8:28). I believe there a is still a lot of good to be seen in my lifetime, but in this stage of my life I am seeing an abundance of goodness and fruit. I am blessed to be lead and taught by a church body whose purpose is to raise up disciples and send them out to bowling green, to the nations and to the ends of the earth. I've always known that God had a great plan for my life--that he would show me a life that brought me pure joy and that rejoiced in the purest of truth. Now, I am confident of this. I am confident of the claim he has taken on my life. This claim is SACRED, it is one that we all have and are called to see with our eyes wide open.

My eyes were truly opened to this while I sat in church a couple of weeks ago pondering where the Lord has brought me and why. It was then that I had one of the simplest yet most profound revelations that I have yet to experience in my life. The life I am living is the ONE life that I have here on this earth--what am I doing with it?? Yes I know, DUH right! I have thought of this before, but not in this way. This time there was a reverence and a Godly fear in the depths of my soul as I pondered. It was then that I began to actually desire God's glory in heaven more than anything here on earth--more than marriage, money, friends, and material things. This is not to say that I do not desire some of these things, but that anything I experience here on earth should only point me to a better inheritance I have in heaven. This also means that I will remain confident in God's purpose for my life and strive to go where I am called. This could mean that he will one day send me to another country, another state, another county, or it could possibly mean that I will continue my life in Bowling Green as I am now--discipling in the church and helping the lost and needy. Whatever that means, I am willing and I am able to go for the one who has paid my debt and has paid it in full.

Elisabeth Elliot talks in her book "Let Me Be a Woman" about a kind of pride that we should all possess; The "right" kind of pride. She actually qoutes from Isak Dinesen's book "Out of Africa" in saying:

" Pride is a faith in the idea that God had when he made us. A proud man is conscious of the idea, and aspires to realize it. He does not strive towards happiness, of comfort, which may be irrelevant to God's idea of him. His success is the idea of God, successfully carried through, and he is in love with his destiny."

I LOVE this! It speaks so much truth into my life, and I hope it does for you as well. Let us be proud of our purpose. Let us desire success in living for his glory, and most of all let his glory be carried out to all the nations through our recognition of his SACRED CLAIM on our lives!

Set-Apart in a Molded World

2008-09-17T18:39:00.000-07:00

I want to dedicate this blog to single women who love God and have made a decision to devote their lives to their one true savior, Jesus Christ. Ladies, this life is not a walk in the park, and if you think college is tough...wait for the real world. I am not suggesting that I am miserable and I am not pleading for sympathy. I praise the Lord for where I am in my life and that I am able to share this with you. The path I am on continually leads me to a closer, more intimate relationship with Christ, and for that I am thankful! However, my flesh tells me a different story. The closer I get to my savior the more I hear the enemy remind me that most of my friends are married or that I could have had the "perfect" life had I not made the decision I made to follow the Lord. Girls, we do have the perfect life--all we need is a savior who loves us unconditionally who we can serve and live for, all the while being overfilled with a Joy and a Peace that is beyond understanding.

I am beginning to realize the truth behind living as a Godly woman, and right now that doesn't involve a husband or kids. It haunts me to know that so many women live for Christ in order to find the right husband or that they spend so much time molding themselves to be the "girl that guys want" ( as cosmopolitan would probably put it) and claim to be living for the right purpose on the inside. Ladies, as long as we are searching for our knight in shining armor, we are not living a life set-apart for Christ. Please trust me when I say that I know this, once again, from experience. I can't tell you how many disappointments I've experienced by chasing after a dream that didn't involve being a disciple of Christ. I never truly experienced peace until the Lord taught me to live a life of contentment ( which I still struggle with every day!!) in his unconditional, infallible love.

This summer I had to reach this conclusion the hard way, but this verse stuck with me( I actually had it hanging up in my box :) ). Paul is speaking to the Corinthian church about being married and begins to talk about those who are married and those who aren't married. He speaks of those who are married as being devoted to one another ( not in a negative connotation) but to those who are not married he says this: " The unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit, but the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit NOT TO LAY ANY RESTRAINT UPON YOU, but to promote good order and to secure your UNDIVIDED DEVOTION TO THE LORD." 1 Corinthians 7:34-35. I by NO means am knocking marriage in this post. Those of you who know me well know that I want nothing more than to be a wife and a mother one day. I have a great desire to experience that love here on earth, but RIGHT NOW I am called to an undivided devotion to the Lord. I pray earnestly that the Lord may put someone in my life who I can love and serve, but I know that to experience God's best I must give him my best. And if his best for me is that I remain single and serve him in the church and in my career then so be it...I trust him. Praise be the God who can offer us contentment in being set-apart in a world where we may only know a mold!

If you are struggling with this I highly suggest the wisdom of Leslie Ludy in the book set-apart femininity!!

SUPER BLOG

2008-09-06T21:22:00.000-07:00

So for those of you who have lost hope in my blog but are reading this right now...Thank you for being patient. I can't tell you how many times I have sat down to describe what the Lord has done in my life in the past 3-4 weeks and drawn out due to the overwhelming amount of thoughts floating around in my head. After reading my last blog, I realized that I really left a lot of you in the dark and I sincerely apologize for that.

After camp, life was confusing--every choice I had to make brought about its own problems, conclusions, consequences, and even fulfillment. I never felt more helpless than I did in this time, and for that I will forever be thankful! As soon as I made the decision in my mind to move to Chattanooga, things started to change. I decided the weekend after camp was over to stay in Bowling Green and spend some time with my dear friend Christy. That Sunday I went to a cookout at a friends house expecting to only partake in some good burgers and fun with friends, but what I got was an answer that I had been waiting for. Her dad is a dentist ( a GREAT dentist!) and that detail honestly slipped my mind until he began discussing my career in dental hygiene with me. The conversation ended in a simple request that I help him out in his office for a couple of weeks, which wasn't promising long term but definitely meant that I had to hang around bowling green a little while longer. After this I had a two hour drive home where I spent almost every minute praying about my conversation with Dr.Clemmons--that the Lord would use me in his office and that he would give Dr.Clemmons discernment in the amount of work I did for him. Eventually, all in the same week, Dr.Clemmons offered me a full-time position in his Brownsville office, I found a place to live, I joined a small group, and I was given the opportunity to lead a small group of college women which is exactly what I feel lead to do. Providence. That word pretty much sums up my life right now. For those of you who have doubted God's ability to provide what you need and more--I am living proof! He really does want the best for us!

When I reflect on this summer and what the Lord taught me through my experience, humility is the only word that comes to mind. This summer I truly learned the meaning of sacrifice--to see myself as nothing in order to serve others. I failed at this A LOT, but for me this summer was about learning and about humbling myself, usually to the point of tears in repentance for every selfish ambition in my heart. My heart was exposed in so many ways this summer, and without that experience I'm not sure if I could handle the world that I am in now. A hymn continues to hum in my mind as I write about this:

"Jesus paid it all, all to him I owe, sin had left a crimson stain he washed it white as snow"

See, -Jesus paid it all- I learned the meaning of this through my experience at camp. I realized the sacrifice that I was called to model through Jesus' endurance of the cross. Jesus resisted sin and pride to the point of shedding his blood, and he constantly reminded me of that this summer when I sinfully wanted attention or recognition for the things I had done. -All to him I owe- Now that I have experienced the depths of his love through his grace, even when my sin was exposed in the deepest parts of my soul, I know even more that everything I have I owe to him. I must fear him even more now than when all I had was faith in his plan for me.

So now I sit....I cry...I marvel...I rest...I have peace and most of all amazement. Thank you for your prayers and for your love and support through a very confusing yet rewarding time in my life. Please pray that I continue to be a faithful steward with the life that I have been given-with my money, my time, my relationships, etc... more to come...I promise :)

Going, Going, Gone...

2008-05-16T22:07:00.000-07:00

Sunday I will be heading to Camp Vesper Point for the summer! I love every minute of my time there, but it is always great to get a little note from my dearest friends ( I am cut off from the world 24 hours a day 6 days a week)! With that being said, I would absolutely LOVE to hear from you this summer...sometimes the smallest note of encouragement can turn a day upside down! Here is my address:

Kasey Gabhart
c/o Camp Vesper Point
3216 Lee Pike
Soddy Daisy, TN 37379

I will definitely be updating my blog over the summer, but I will only have access on the weekends! Thanks!

Faithfulness is better than the "AMERICAN DREAM"

2008-05-09T21:59:00.000-07:00

I never knew that graduation would truly be as bittersweet as I have experienced it to be. Sweet in knowing that I am no longer bound to Western Kentucky University to fulfill degree requirements and bitter in realizing what the world expects of me as a college graduate. In my mind I am free to fall where the Spirit leads me to do his work and to live for him, but I must confess that the pressures of the American Dream are pressing hard down on me. You wouldn't believe the looks I get when I tell people that I really have no idea what I will be doing or where I will be going after the summer. I proceed to give them the answer they are looking for.."of course I will be working very hard this summer to find a dental office in Bowling Green or Chattanooga and I will have it figured out before I leave camp." While it is very true that I will work very hard to find a job, I do not intend to know for sure if that is where God will place me. My intentions are to work at camp where I am being called and to continue following the Lord's direction from there.

John Piper's sermon "Faithfulness is Better Than Life" penetrated my heart and brought all of my thoughts for the week to a head. All week I have been thinking about and praying for those close to me who have fallen for the American Dream and are now experiencing a "life isn't all its cracked up to be" kind of reality. I realized that their lives were missing one key component--The fear of a God who has power to save and grace to all who seek his face. That is the one element that I had to remind myself of when I was faced with the "after graduation" questions. Paul serves a perfect example in Acts 20:22 when he speaks to the elders saying:

" And now, behold I am going to Jerusalem, constrained by the spirit, not knowing what will happen to me there, except that the Holy Spirit testifies to me in every city that imprisonment and afflictions await me. But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify the gospel of the grace of God."

so, what am I doing after graduation? I am going to Chattanooga for the the summer to Invest in other believers and share Christ with kids who are lost, not knowing where he will send me after that; only knowing that money will probably be scarce and it will still be hard to live in this world and to reject the American Dream. I do not do this for myself, but to finish what the Lord has sent me to do; to testify the gospel of the grace of God.

Back to Reality

2008-04-29T22:30:00.000-07:00

God's sovereign timing has once again drawn me to this computer screen only to help myself become aware of a lost sense of urgency in my heart. Oh the ups and downs of living in this world! For a straight month my eternal perspective has been immensely off balance, causing my heart to desire things of this world over what God knows is best for me. On spring break I went to Cleveland, Ohio where I was introduced to people whose perspective on life taught me a lot about my own desires. While there I found myself dying to be in their position--desiring to seek the Lord's direction and to pour the love of Christ onto those who are placed in my life. I developed a peace in my heart because I knew that God created me to live exactly how these church planters live in the context of the culture around me. I carried this home with me and began to see my life in Bowling Green in that very same context, but then life happened. When did my heart become hard? Why did it take me so long to fall on my knees before the Lord? A few words come to mind: Doubt, Stress, Fear(not of the Lord), selfish ambition, idolatry. Pick one and I can give you a story! This trial did not come about out of my unwillingness to give my time and life to God; it came with lack of purpose and communication with God. For some time my path seemed extremely dry and not glorifying to God, but out of revelation I see now that this is rooted in my lack of trust.

The Revelation: are you ready? PRAYER. enough said. Wherever God sends me, I must trust that he is using me to intercede on someones behalf. I am going to meet and build relationships with people who do not know what to pray or how to pray to him. I am even going to be in situations where the future is unknown, but the secret to my communication with him is knowing that he is not sending me there for my own satisfaction. And I must also be aware of Where I am right this minute, and I must be here! By this I mean that my job, schoolwork, money, time etc...must only be exercise of my discipline. I am only called to be a steward of what the Lord has given me, not to live for what I have on earth.

"I think I find most help in trying to look on all the interruptions and hindrances to work that one has planned out for oneself as discipline, trials sent by God to help one against getting selfish over one's work--one's work for God--consists in doing some trifling haphazard thing that has been thrown into one's day. It is not a waste of time, as one is tempted to think, it is the most important part of the work of the day--the part one can best offer to God. do not rush after the planned work; trust that the time to finish it will be given sometime, and keep a quiet heart about it."

--Annie Keary

" The end of the matter; all has been hear. Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgment, with every secret thing, whether good or evil."

--Ecclesiastes 12:13-14

Time to Simplify!

2008-01-30T13:30:00.000-08:00

What I am about to say may be the simplest thought I have had in the past 3 months, and because of that I feel that it would be extremely necessary to share with others. A simple thought? You probably don't have time to read one of those; Why waste your time? I mean blogging is all about flaunting the depth of information that we as humans are capable of pondering, right? Well if that were the case then I wouldn't have a blog at all! Sometimes we just need to SIMPLIFY!! In that case, have you ever thought about how simple and beautiful the concept of faith really is? I recently read through the book of Matthew, and I haven't stopped thinking about the small examples of faith that I gathered from that book. I can think of two examples in particular in Matthew Ch.9. On two accounts Jesus heals Human Beings of their illness due to their faith in him as a merciful Christ. Never in these examples does it say that they were healed because they impressed Jesus with their profound thoughts of who he really is. NO!!!! They KNEW that he was the Son of God and that he could perform amazing things! Another example comes from Chapter 15; A woman who knows she is not worthy of Jesus' blessing, but because of her faith receives his healing power for her daughter.

Now, I believe that in Ephesians it says, " For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not of your own doing; it is the gift of God. not a result of works, so that no one may boast" Ephesians 2:8-9. By grace you have been saved THROUGH FAITH. Through knowledge...NO. Through the law...NO. God's grace is granted to us simply by our faith. Now, I do not in any way intend to criticize those who have been given a gift to teach the things they have learned and who continue growing in knowledge in order to use this ability; Teaching is a gift from God and should be used by those whom God has called. However, questioning who Jesus is just because our minds can not grasp the thought of a savior signifies a complete lack of faith, and scripture clearly tells us that through our faith in Jesus Christ we are saved from the condemnation of an eternity in hell. Of course, with this proclamation we are called to a commission which in turn leads us to be shaped into the image of Christ ( just a disclaimer for those who read this and say that I am supporting a faith with no action).

Simple in words, but extremely difficult in life. I think things we be a lot more clear and easy if we would just learn to simplify.

Quenching my thirst

2007-11-20T20:06:00.000-08:00

As contrary as it may appear, the last couple of weeks have been very rough for me. I would say that currently the Lord is teaching me a lot about being his child in a world that has adopted a life outside of the perfect design that he wants us to see and live. I say that this has been rough for me because I have been and am in situations that my human nature tells me are lonely and uncomfortable, but the word of God tells me differently. Someone recently pointed me toward Hebrews 12, where I studied for days until I finally saw the reality and truth behind this season of my life. This is a time of discipline, where I will learn to endure - a time of putting everything under the authority of Christ so that he can mold me into a child of his who walks in the faith that her creator is working everything for the good of his glory. A time of constant thirst for discernment and knowledge of truth. Especially a time for learning about the patience of becoming a woman who fears the Lord in all of her words, decisions, and actions. I want to make every day that I have on this earth count for the glory of our God, and I want to see his goodness in every situation that he sovereignly places me in.

" Until the will and affections are brought under the authority of Christ, we have not begun to understand, let alone accept, his LORDSHIP. The cross, as it enters the love life, will reveal the heart's truth . My heart I knew would forever be a lonely hunter unless settled "" Where true Joys are to be found.""
- Elisabeth Elliot

This is such a beautiful line, and it is so true! Unless my passion , will, and affections are brought under the Lord's authority, I will never see his Lordship in my life. I will never thirst for his wisdom or trust that he knows what is best for me.

Divine Guidance = A Pursuit of Holiness

2007-10-03T20:12:00.000-07:00

Can I just say first of all that I could never be thankful enough for the mercy that God has had on me, and for the Grace that he has shown me so that I am able to share with you and others what he is doing in my life. Why I have been chosen to become a steward of his love and grace I will never understand, but I do know that I accept it without question.

With that being said, God has definitely revealed a lot to me in the past few months. I do believe that the most recurrent question on my mind in this time of my life has been, "where next?" As college students we are faced with many life altering questions such as "who am I going to marry?", "where am I going to live?", "which career path do I take?", and the most popular "what is my calling?". I am here to tell you that persistant wondering into the nature of God's will for our lives will only lead us into a state of confusion and may even possibly convince us that we can figure these things out on our own. Don't get me wrong, it is very important to make wise decisions about our future, but what is our source of guidance when we make these decisions? Are we seeking guidance and discernment from the Lord or are we taking things into our own hands because we are tired of waiting on the Lord to miraculously reveal to us "the calling" that he has for our life?

Trust me when I say that I ONLY share thoughts that I have learned through MY experiences. My most valuable source for this blog is my own sinful nature and the Lords restoration of that sin. I have spent countless hours asking the same questions that Iaddressed in the above paragraph, and the Lord has undoubtedly and gracefully led me into understanding of his character. God's will can seem complex and even imposssible to figure out, but I am here to tell you that God has revealed the essence of his will and purpose for our lives through his scripture:

"Finally then, Brothers, We ask and urge you in the Lord Jesus Christ, that as you recieved from us how you ought to live and to please God, just as you are doing, that you do so more and more. For you know what instructions we gave you through the Lord Jesus. For THIS is the will of God, your sanctification ( or Holiness)..."
1 Thessalonians 4:1-3

As you can see, God's will lies within our pursuit of holiness. God's decree ( the command and plan of God for eternity) is lived out when we seek to live a life that is pleasing to him. So now that we know what God's will is, how do we seek God's guidance in fulfilling his will? John Piper puts it best when he says:

" God guides us by bringing our hearts and minds into harmony or sympathy with his own heart and mind so that when we study a situation, we discern ( you might even say intuit) what path would be BEST accord with the character and purposes of god that we know from scripture"
- John Piper in his sermon " The Goodness of God and the Guidance of Sinners"

That pretty much sums it up, and David tells us in Psalm 25 how to pray for this guidance when we are in situations that have left us questioning our decisions.

" Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I will wait all the day long." - Psalm 25:4-5

As Christians, it is our duty to be in a constant pursuit of God's character through study of his word and constant prayer. If we do not fear him enough to ask him for wisdom and discernment then we are ultimately looking to the wisdom of our flesh, which will lead us down a road of destruction. If this is an issue in your life, then I encourage you to read the rest of psalm 25 and to check out John Pipers sermon on Desiringgod.org for a better understanding of this, and I also encourage you to trust that the Lord will guide you and that the results will bless you beyond measure!!

Passion and Purity

2007-06-27T13:04:00.000-07:00

"Discipleship usually Brings us into the necessity of choice between duty and desire. They are not always mutually exclusive, however. When our hearts are set on obedience, we can be sure of the needed wisdom to tell the difference between a conflict and a harmony. It may be a slow and painful process."

-Elisabeth Elliot "Passion and Purity"

So, as you can see, I picked up another book and once again I found the right book at the right time!! Elisabeth Elliot has the wisdom and experience that every young Godly woman needs to hear during this critical time of her life.

The reason that I could not put this book down was because as Elisabeth recalled her experiences as a young single woman, I could relate every ounce of my thought life and spiritual struggles to the ones that she described having as a senior in college. This time of searching and figuring things out is so critical in a womans life. I know this because I am a young woman attempting to live according to Gods will in a world where desire is anything but waiting for what the Lord can bring to us. The most common desire of a woman in this world is to be loved unconditionally; meaning that she will go to any length to manipulate this "love" into being what she had always imagined it to be ( Notice I said "in this world"). A woman under God's provision knows that her father loves her unconditionally and that her desire is only to please him and to rest in his grace. The hard part of this picture is knowing where our earthly desires end and our heavenly desires take over.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart"
- psalm 37:4

This psalm is a comfort to many of us, but I am afraid that we have taken it to mean that when we trust in the Lord we get everything WE want. I know I have taken it that way in the past, and that has actually been my struggle and my prayer for months upon months. Endless times I have asked the Lord to reveal HIS desires, HIS will, HIS direction, and all he had to show me were these words:

" Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all of the things will be given to you as well."
- Matthew 6:33

" Whom have I in heaven thee? and there is none on earth that I desire beside thee."
- psalm 73:25

" The Lord said to Aaron, " You will have no inheritance in their land, nor will you have any share among them; I am your share and your inheritance among the israelites.""
- Numbers 18:20

So back to Elisabeth's qoute: "...It may be a slow and painful process." I know that the process of discerning God's will from my own desires may be a hard road, but I also know that as of today my only desire is to live in obedience to the one who gave his son so that I may live in his kingdom. Because of that, I am confident that he will show me HIS will, HIS direction, and HIS desires.

Pearls

2007-06-18T10:05:00.001-07:00

Those of you who know me know that I love pearls. It's not the price I love, but the gentle classy touch that a pearl can add to a simple ordinary look. It wasn't until recently that I realized the symbolism that a simple strand of pearls had to my life. For those of you who do not know, a pearl is made when a piece of sand or something of that nature is lodged into an oyster causing an irritation within the shell. The oyster then forms somewhat of a shell around this irritation thus resulting in a beautiful pearl.

My sin is very symbolic to the sand within this oyster shell. For the longest time, I allowed my sin to remain with the other thousands of grains of sand in this world. I was comfortable on the beach and on the ocean floor where I fit in with so many other grains of sand. I was completely unaware of what God could make of my life if I allowed him to take this sin, but all along I could see him;I knew his shell was not far from me. The moment I finally allowed him to transform my sin a beautiful jewel was created, handcrafted by the creator of the universe.

I still have so many irritations in my life that do not reflect the love that Christ has shed on me, but out of his grace he pulls me in and makes pearl after pearl out of my ugly sin. My prayer is that he continues to strand my pearls, and that one day I will wear a necklace displaying the fruit that he has produced out of my life.

I am so excited that he has given me this time to be his and to really learn how I can use my gifts to serve him. I know that through this time I have in waiting for the Lord to reveal his calling for my life I am going to grow into the woman that will one day bring glory to his name. Then I can proudly wear the necklace that has been so carefully crafted by the one true love of my life...Jesus Christ.